3 Phases of Life in USA Explained – Education, Job and Family
Following comments was posted by user names Sumo in reply to Bhaskar Ravishankar.
Since he comment was detailed and long, I’m sharing as a blog post. I have made edits to the format and added titles and spell check for typos. .Actual comment is unedited.
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When you stay in US you are sacrificing your parents/relatives/friends/colleges.
Once you are here you would understand how formal it is here with so called friendship. You would not only miss your homeland & relatives and food ….Yes food too. (You cannot imagine how horrible restaurants could be with unskilled cooks. will come later to this).
Let me start putting things together.
During Masters
First of all if you start studying here for MS you would realize how tuff it is to stay here with Indian rupees. Even with 80% scol you would realize and creep every time you are hungry.
Wont have time to cook (with studies) and basic ingredients are equally expensive. Stores are far away . Life in US is good is painful without cars. Buses run only in cities often infrequent and to get to the stop and store you would have to walk 1.5 miles.
I have seen friends eating bread and jam for a month. Even someday we had to rely on water as while waiting for money to come from India.
There are several things to say including burglary and shooting that could happen anytime in evening as there are huge number of afro american population homeless with guns. My friend got mugged with gun pointing on his head.
After Grad School
2. Ok lets say you have already graduated from MS tuff time is over and now you need jobs. You would really pity how hard it is to get a job with 2 Yrs Indian IT experience here and in campus.
If you cant get it within one month you have to return back.
H1B Visa and Job
Lets say you passed that phase and now you already have a job on H1-B visa probably. Now comes the tuff time.
The US is very diplomatic while home ministers visit India and publicly announce Visa quotas.
In reality you would find how difficult it is to get stamped with H1B visa in Indian consulates.
Let me tell you the count of my friend who could not come back to US after India visit it is 17. Thats the trend in last two years.
They would ask for more documentation and within that time frame.
Eventually leading to successive interviews and refusal and revoking H1B. This is the current trend.
Lots of people would deny it but its an hard fact.
People are scared to go to India now because there is s high chance that you wont be back.
To get the loan amount recovered you need to work for some years. So kind of confined within this land ….well thats acceptable till you get GC.
How many years can you be confined ? 4 , 5, 6 or 7 ?
Well there are people who can bear that …if you could you are fine too. Ok let me add another constraint.
Atleast in IT job mostly we find that the projects are short lived 6 mths to an year max in general.
Being H1B worker you would have to move a lots for every new project. Its ok with kids but with Kids in School you would probably have to lave away from them and travel home every two weeks. One week if you are rich 
Family and Kids
Ok now comes the critical part.
Life in US is good if you can spend.
Everything is expensive and within that 5000$ ( if it is after tax then you are earning really well …again pessimists would deny) you would manage everything.
Now comes the Indian mindset. I have seen people squeezing every little $ as you would always thing it Rs50.
Seen people leading so poor quality life that Americans really make a fun out of them.
Imagine Indians going to Disneyland with bread, jam, chips and 2 litre coke bottles in plastic grocery store bags and seating in pavements like beggers eating those.
Can’t really understand how they have a mind set in Disneyland like that(ticket around $95 perday).
So saving day by day each day they build up money for their children to live well. They never return to India at their old ages. The $ – Rupee conversion never takes place. Leading a low quality life year after year they loose their life.
Ok now children!!!
When they grow and go to schools they want to get American culture and try to show off (someway they have to be superior often not being Indian).
They try to spend, get American culture and hate their parents try to mix with Americans and be an American. If your child calls police for your misbehavior you would be detonated and they would be took to some foster homes and its a fact again.
They would be second class citizens here and would always try to gain the privilege they lack.
Imagine you could overcome all these.
Tell me one thing ….what advantage did you gained coming to US and sacrificing your life ???
Also did your parents do any wrong you ditched them? Don’t tell me that I will bring my parents to US. The health insurance itself would be half of your current salary every month.
Disclaimer – The opinions expressed in the post are of the writer and do not necessarily reflect the viewpoints of the Happy Schools Blog.
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looks like the author lost his job or something and now has no option but to move back. I know several such people taking a U turn after such things and justifying their decision with lengthy social media posts like this by painting a negative picture.
when people face hardships in life what do most people do?????there are certain types of human nature wbulance service in indiahich will come into light..one may ask what is life????is it what you want????some people just want no ups and downs of life keep of doing daily chores even when they are dissatisfied deep down their soul…we ,if we would feel life in US hard for some reasons……how many of us have ever been an independent after our 18 ????we are constantly being shadowed by our parents..so we are ought to find it difficult when we ourselves are on a direct line of fire…..i dont know and dont want to listen what hardships foreign students face in US,believe me there are more no.of chinese students going to US than from india…so stop being such a crybaby……stop winnowing things cuse you cant ahve a medicine without a side effect….and that harsh truth of life on the face of earth no matter where you go.tell me why u want to go to US on the first place ????cause you want only cream and not the effort which it takes…atleast one thing i can tell you about US …you wont be pushed back if you have talents,enthusiasm,professionalism and patience.and yes dont use afro-american again…..they are not the ones who rape a girl on a moving bus,they are not the ones who kill just because you overtook your car.atleast i havent heard a case where a famous ex.sportsman was thrashed by the bodyguards of a local minister just because he overtook their car..so you are telling me that is it ok to live in and let go such incidents ???are u satisfied when ministers who gets elected are dumber than 8th grader????is there an ambulance service in india????except for gujarat where they have 108 SERVICE AMBULANCE JUST LIKE 911….i think its ok to overlook these and many more just because we know there nowhere we cud go and complain abt it….cause everybody wud say in the end …chalta ..yahan par to aisa hi hain…kya kare……..here you dont know who wud turn you into if you wud say something about your boss and its amazing the smiling faces ppl wear on their face even if they wud be hating you like hell………so there is nothing to compare to…………………………and its my personal opinion:::why you want to have kids when you know you cant provide for them now?????its so oxymoronic that you wont eat out but you go to disneyland and eat bread and jam?????telll me what msg you just passed to your children????they will think that you have money to buy tickets but you are shrewed to eat out in mcdonalds….why not to show them real picture???they are also the part of family ,dont repeat the mistakes of shadowing them…..AND THERE ARE LOT MANY THINGS TO TALK ABOUT BUT ………………….so moral of story is dont expect success to come to you ,you have to earn it by blood and sweat……….if you are not willing to sacrifice things to prioritize some more important things in life then you r better off in your homeland where atleast you know you cant complain cause this is where you are born cause you have accepted struggle as integral part of your life living in india……….thats it ……….i think fellow bloggers are wise enough to take their own decissions ……
Hi HSB,
I think you should remove this article. It is a lot depressing.
Get used to it. That’s life and thats the reality. If you can’t even read the reality, how are you goign to face challenges in your life?
I totally stand with your opinion. People need to know all the facts look at reality as is. Though some portion of the blog may be grim. It’s just facts and reality of a life in US. People should Think of all the aspects and be aware of hard hitting reality, before making a life altering decision.
Thanks, Nirmal. People always complain when they see a negative tone post 🙂
Just by the way he has written his post, it’s very obvious that this dude hasn’t tried to assimilate into the American culture. OP, if you are reading this – you didn’t get a job after master’s because your communication skills are pretty bad, not because the American system is trying to push you down. At the risk of making generalizations, you seem like the person who never got out of his bubble of hanging out with only indian people and doing the exact same things you would have done in Bangalore or Chennai.
The American society is not why your life sucks, it’s your close minded outlook towards life mixed in with a weird sense of entitlement. If, after 2-4 years of graduating, you’re still making close to 5k a month and converting $ to Rupees, you are the problem. Have you ever tried networking with anyone outside the consultancy (again, making a generalization) you work for? Did you ever ask a friend to connect you with someone from their workplace for a new opportunity? Judging by the way you write and what you write, I can safely put my bets on the answer being ‘no’. You are not entitled to a better, high paying job. You are not entitled to a better life. You need to work towards it. And work in this sense doesn’t mean coding hard and QA, it means so much more than that. The thing I like the most about American culture of individualism is that no one in this country cares enough about me to actively hinder my progress. It’s the most merit based society in human history.
Hi HSB,
I am Avaneesh, Completed my masters in Bioinformatics in the 2010 from reputed university with Distinction. Now i want to Do my PHD in USA so .. I tried my best… which is an arduous task getting PhD directly with Masters in your Native state. So I thought to go for Masters and try for the PhD. Please suggest appropriate ways to get hold of Guide during Masters.
Waiting for your Positive reply, Thank you.
Hello HSB Fans,
The Author of this post is trying to show us the -ve impacts of life while studying, working, and leading a life in US with a Family.
As a Technical recruiter my job is to make a calls to ‘n’ of guys everyday who are on OPT/CPT/GC/H1B/USC. I notice there are 5/20 graduated indians from US universities who has a pretty confidence levels, which makes them to crack the telephonic interviews in a shorter time and then sit in a project for making a $’s and these people are very strong enough to focus on their long term goals of getting a GC.
At the same time I noticed rest 15/20 folks who are waiting for opportunities to come on their way. They are not desperate of jobs nor their career and spend their days after MS with part time jobs and make the money for C2H5OH n stuff and these categorical people are lazy in atttending interview calls. Getting a interview call is a big opportunity in USA and listen the hiring managers of the consulting companies will look for confidence level and then give the priority in scheduling the interviews.. (I know I’m going out of main topic, I guess the author of this post is among 15 folks.)
Word 2 All MS Aspirants: — >> Guys, Remember the purpose of your travel to US and then spend ya days accordingly. (I’m not talking about the Hi-fy folks who want to return India after course completion.). If you want to lead a better life in USA, then be prepared for everything(Up n Downs)… Believe in your will power, it take u to infiniite heights and show you wonders..
Good Luck for all the US ASPIRANTS.
I studied in the US and now live here with a great job for over 10 years. This post paints an utterly negative and wrong picture about studying and living in the US. That’s all I can say about this opinion.
Thank you James. For you have encouraged people to still have hope in applying for US schools, well done.
Author forgets to mention the curious case of India.
HSB i have been reading Blogs for past couple of years and they really gave some good insights;however lately they seem to be becoming low on content and high on REPITITION at least on some topics like this one; only the language is different; while every coin has 2 sides and the probability of right call in making a choice between USA and India is equal you can make it your favor by doing your own SWOT Analysis and then taking a call rather than going by Generalized Analysis. Maybe something like the Point Based Immigration System followed by many countries like Canada which makes it more Objective rather than Subjective. If you could put something like this on your website I am sure people would love it .
Btw if Anushka could share the name of Insurance Company and the Plan it would benefit many Parents if God forbids something happens.
Solely the writer’s opinion! I have seen Indians born and breed here in the USA and they are role models. I have seen other national too, Iranians, Chinese, even Africans who are not only enviable role models, but still keep track with their roots. Besides, some of the best, most respectable individuals I have seen are pure blooded Americans – these guys are just decent and well mannered. This article is heavily biased
Its real hard to live here . But I can say, If you could accommodate yourself to the so called “American Culture”.. your life is pretty easy .. You will come across Mixed culture, people from all over the world. I have friends from Saudi Arabia, Iran, Persia, Egypt, China, Taiwan.. “American Culture” is something that can be defined to be “Very formal.” You know, people here love to converse with foreigners..It wholly depends on us, how we get with people. They have the best attitude of helping people around them.. From the experiences I come across, its all about understanding people and be broad minded. If you have a narrow/crooked mind, life is like a hell for you to live. I am not giving any made up replies..
Please I need your help .Please help me .I want to study in USA but I am in high school I want to study computer science but undergraduate program not MASTER .PLEASE TELL ME SHOULD I GO NOW ,OR I AM TOO YOUNG TO STUDY IN USA WITH THIS AGE. THANK YOU
No one can demotivate anyone . I don’t think the author meant it but told the hardships abroad. It’s our discretion to take it or leave it. Actually this article helps people aspiring to US to mentally prepare before coming.
We should not blame him for all these negative points mentioned in this post,but it gives 70 % real insight about the life in Us…People who are ready to feel the pain….Welcome to United states of America !!! 😛
I request, can any one tell me the situation how it will be for a guy who want to do MBA in healthcare administration after 2 years of experience in US healthcare field with out GMAT. Will the Visa office approves it what are the chances of rejection thought we have a I-20.
May be I am a lucky one. I cook daily and the menu list is long. I spend money as needed. Brought my parents here for 6 months…perfect life. Unfortunately, my father had to undergo a surgery and I insisted it to be done in states. Even though I am a student, their insurance for 6 months that covered his entire treatment which costed more than $20k with $100 deductible was not even 1/2 of my one month’s salary.
you mean to say with half of your student’s salary, you managed your father’s surgery. you paid all the bills????really interesting-which insurance were your parents covered with???
I am damn sure that you are one of these.
Ph.D student/ Post Doc/ student on H1B.
Am I right?
– Vignesh
One thing is sure. You are definitely like the blog post author, who generalizes without much thought. I request HSB to delete the above comment.
Deleted.
No pain, no gain. One should only be willing to learn and possibilities will be endless. You can not achieve anything without hardwork and sacrificing something, be it in India or USA. Up until now, the most satisfied thing I have noticed is that american people recognize your talent
They notice very small things about you which you may not notice that they are noticing. I was having dinner with three americans. One of them received a phone call and asked us to remember a phone number. Later, after dinner, when we reached home, he asked for the number. No one remembered it except me. And they got, super-impressed. I was like I have not done anything great. But they saw it in a different way. They thought, I am good with numbers and my memory is strong.
They also give you what you deserve. No BS. In India, people will do hardwork and they still lag behind and only those move forward who has contacts with minister and some big amount of money to shell out of their pocket. I HATE BOTH !!!
You are right that we are leaving behind parents, families, friends and food but at the end of the day, when we return home after learning something useful, having some invaluable life experience, it gives us satisfaction and motivation to work hard. Atleast, in my case, it is so. Everything goes through hardships, be it in India or US. Even I am going through some of them but that doesn’t mean we start blaming others. Its our will, our choice that we came here. And we are pretty mature to judge everything you said above. We are taking responsibility of our actions and everything and leave that to us. You will do yourself too good, if you start concentrating a bit on your life. Have a good day !!!
hi
I am really appreciated for your so logical reply and comment , I got your words in my life
Fahimeh
What does the person behind this post aim to accomplish by staying in India? A lousy job which requires no work? He/she talks about spending cash in the US, I ask him how lavish a lifestyle one can afford in India with a 3-4 lpa IT job in India. Talking about healthcare, I’d much rather pay for something that would help me when I am in dire straits than die.
And instead of giving merit to the universities for the quality of education,the main point of concern is food. You talk about afro american people with guns (which is a totally racist stereotype by the way) but do tell me this, how can you be safe in a country where you are shot in incidents of road rage or because you took somebody else’s plate of’ cholle bhature’.
The kids in I.dia already want to emulate western thought in everything they do, so it won’t be a big deal. Child services in the US actually protect children unlike in India.
You talk of ‘ditching’ your parents. Really? And you are close to them if you are in bangalore and they are in delhi?
If you donot wish to go to the US for higher studies, don’t. Don’t come to a blog which provides students with valuable information, students who have actually given thought to and are clear about what they want to achieve in their life, and waste your breath trying to portray your hypocritical sense of nationalism.
Very Nice reply ……what kind of negative person he is ….
I appreciate your comment on the blog posted. Really needed it. In my opinion, I feel the statement made are on grounds of a repulsive motive and would discourage most of the people who have made up their mind to explore the world outside India, rather than being just one in a million striving to prove his/her worth. I am not being subversive, but I believe it is an individual choice to be made on going abroad is worthwhile.
Cheers!
How negative can one person be? Its like 2012, Godzilla and Downfall all combined in one big comment!
The admission process in India is not fair. Meritorious students are denied entry and 70 % seats are given by reservation. After graduation most of the good jobs are given to IIT, nit, bits students. No opportunity to rest of 90% graduates.
These poor fellows gets lured by carrier counselors who portait Rosy picture of USA ,H1 ,Opt green card.
These huge no of students fall prey to herd mentality ,take huge loan and land up in USA.
Now they get hit by reality ,every moment they feel alienated and not welcome. Now a tough struggle to earn back the money they have invested starts.
I know of few students who have applied to hundreds of jobs and got just couple of interviews.
Make sure to think of reality before you take decision to invest big money. Only handful smart hardworking students get good returns and opportunities.
USA jobs are for their own citizen s obviously.